An Alzheimer’s Love Story: How to be there for the one you love

We had a VERY special guest (and addressed a very important topic!) for the 1st Caregiving Insights episode of 2024!

Todd “TJ” Keitz, Founder of this blog, Caregiving Insights, and My Care Friends, was truly honored to welcome the former Governor of Wisconsin, Martin J. Schreiber.

Marty is a wonderful human being, who cared for his wife Elaine for 19 years along the Alzheimer’s journey. In this episode, he shares so much insight into the journey of a caregiver for someone with Alzheimer’s and how to love both people — the woman he first fell in love with and was his rock (and glue of the family), and the second woman that didn’t know who he was.

Marty is kind, engaging, funny, caring, loving…and realistic about the challenges faced by Alzheimer’s caregivers, and often specifically how men are further challenged.

In this heartfelt conversation, Marty shares so much insight that is actionable for viewers — whether they: a) are caregivers of someone with Alzheimer’s, b) simply care about someone that has this dreaded disease (or any form of dementia), or c) are caregiver to anyone.

Love is a universal language and Marty’s story of “My Two Elaines” is certainly a love story!
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While this 35-minute episode is truly worth watching in its entirety, we understand everyone’s lives are busy. In case you don’t have time to watch it all, you can go directly to one of the topics below:

(minute:second)
00:35 Introduction of Marty
03:58 Episode preface
04:39 How Alzheimer’s initially shows up
05:40 Initial ability as caregiver (or lack thereof)
08:20 Switch to be a better caregiver
10:50 Sign of courage & strength to ask for help
13:31 Unacknowledged grieving and confronting it
15:22 Surviving vs. Thriving — and Joy
17:50 Importance of therapeutic fibbing
20:06 Heart & souls connecting
23:04 Mood sharing
24:20 “Join their world”: Evolving from caregiving of the person you knew to the “new” person — how and when
26:19 Poignancy of Elaine’s Notes & Marty’s “Pivot”
30:08 Marty’s final thoughts & “the lifeline”
32:44 Todd’s final thoughts and Elaine’s beautiful love note to Marty

Along with Marty, we hope you enjoy this special episode of Caregiving Insights and find it helpful along your journey. Should you like to read Marty’s exceptional book, MY TWO ELAINES, you can find it on Amazon. It’s truly worth every penny!

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Todd has been primary caregiver and patient advocate since June 2018 for his parents, who each are faced with serious illness. This journey led him to create the blog www.1day1week.com, this YouTube channel Caregiving Insights, and the newly launched My Care Friends website for caregivers and patient advocates — to connect, share, and support each other!

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